Cleanse Summary

Yesterday was the end of the hard core cleanse and marked the fifth day of this "adventure."

Last night was the first time I really was wanting something OTHER than what we were eating. Nothing sounded good but everything I couldn't have. I think I had set it in my mind that yesterday was the end, but I'd done such a great job of being prepared both logistically with the food and psychologically. However, when I woke up this morning and realized that I was going to be eating the same as the last 5 days with the exception of adding tomatoes, I was bummed. I bought things to eat during the week during my reintroduction phase. I'm focusing between tomorrow and Friday to add the following: butter, potatoes, citrus, eggs, cheese and wheat/gluten. Then the week after will add soy, corn, cottage cheese/yogurt, and maybe some meats. Sugar will be the very last thing I'll add. It's very hard to find any packaged food without sugar, potato starch, wheat or tomatoes. So if I can get 3 of those out of the way, then I'll be able to have a wider variety of foods. Thank god. ;)

I'm not sure why I'm tired today, but I am. Special K and I even bailed out of yoga today in favor of shopping, my getting my haircut, and watching Terminator at home.

Our day at the springs was wonderful yesterday and well deserved. But it's been my ritual to have Mexican food at this spot in Gresham on my way back that I love and I missed it last night and then I was just pouting about it all evening. But... I had a salad and sunflower seeds for dinner and I didn't deter. I committed to the 5 day cleanse and I finished it. And I'm proud of both myself and Special K for getting through this. It would have been so much more difficult without him here doing this with me... I'm eternally grateful for him.

Now I need to find a way to recommit myself to the process of reintroducing foods over the course of the next few weeks. Special K and I are watching the Final Four right now and he's just made some brown rice pasta with pasta sauce and I'm going to spoon up and see how it is. Oh dear lord, what I wouldn't give for some pizza.

more soon.

Cleanse Day FIVE

Hi all!

Today marks the official last day of the hard core cleanse. Tomorrow I'll start reintroducing foods back into my diet and seeing how my body reacts to see if I have an allergies. I'm going to start small. I think I'll start with tomatoes. Then butter (I know, sounds weird, but...) then potatoes (b/c what's a potato without butter?!) and then corn and then soy. Those are the most common ingredients (not the butter though) in just about any vegan recipe so, in order to carry this out a few more weeks while I'm doing the reintroduction phase, I'll be able to have a wider variety of recipes. Speaking of which....

Recipes for you today:
Pumpkin Curry with Lentils and Apples - I did not like this one, but it was Special K's favorite soup I've made thus far. So... I think to each their own on this. I used two different types of squash as pumpkin is no where to be found. I think I just don't love lentils.

Quinoa Veggie Salad with Zesty Vinaigrette - I just made this this morning for our outing to Bonneville Hot Springs so we wouldn't starve up there and while I haven't had an official dish, I tasted it and it is WONDERFUL! I didn't use tomatoes (obviously), but did add a third cucumber and a huge zucchini as this makes A LOT of salad!! I ended up making two batches of dressing in order to have enough. I can't wait to munch down on this (for weeks to come based on how much I have!)

Yesterday Special K was away from home and I worked out alone for the first time since Monday. I did a high intensity cardio DVD, but I'm ready to get back into the gym. Nothing does a body good like 45 minutes at the gym. Last night we went to Laughter Yoga, which, as usual, was a hoot. We finished Die Hard and Special K decided to sleep at home which meant I was in bed, lights out, by 10pm and slept HARD for 10 hours! whoa! I do have to note, though, that this has been an amazing week for Special K and I. We have gotten along remarkably well and I couldn't have asked for a better partner in this. My strengths are his weaknesses and his strengths are mine so it's very "chi"

One more thing to note for today as I shove my mouth full of quinoa and black beans leftover from a few nights ago as my first meal of the day at 11am..... I'm down another couple of pounds for a total of 6-10.6 lbs this week. I don't know which is more accurate b/c I got two numbers on day one. But I will say this... it's a total of 18.2 pounds for the year so far. I'm very happy about that. Now if only my clothes would fit me better (hence the need for the gym!).

Thanks for your continued support on my journey. I'll write my last daily installment regarding the cleanse tomorrow. I'm going to wrap up work early and head out to Bonneville Hot Springs with my sexy man for a congratulatory soak and day of R&R! Happy Friday!

Cleanse DAY FOUR

It's the beginning of Day Four and so far all is well. PLUS I'm down 9 lbs for a total of 16.6 for the year. That's a hair over halfway to the reasonable goal I'd set for myself for the year (but more is always good)!

I forgot to include my recipes since Monday. They have all been very good but there have definitely been favorites.

Day TWO:
White Beans and Peppers - This was not a soup like the picture indicates but it was SOOO GOOOOOD! I loved it!
Hawaij Vegetable Soup - We couldn't find Hawaij anywhere in town so we used regular curry powder. It was a very bland soup and we didn't use the potato or tomato (b/c we can't) or celery (b/c i hate it) and I added zucchini instead. We also used veggie broth and water instead of boullion b/c boullion is so not friendly to our diet (nor are most canned beans either so we used raw). With salt added, this was pretty tasty and very beautiful.

Day THREE:
Vegetarian Cassoulet - Again, we cut out the potato, but it didn't need it, it's like a very thick stew as it was. We didn't need to cook it the 9 hours it says as it was VERY VERY done after 6 and we should have pulled it off after 5. Even though the beans were overdone, it was WONDERFUL. This dish was surprisingly tasty from all the herbs (again, added salt and a dash of cumin).
Quinoa with black beans - Wow. That's all I can say. No corn added, but this dish was FANTASTIC! I made it at night for lunch today but we couldn't help but dip into it a bit. It is outstanding and flavorful with a great texture.

I wasn't that hungry yesterday which surprised me. We'll see how today goes. I plan on doing a little work out here at home while Special K is out for most of the day until this evening doing stuff at his house. Tonight is Laughter Yoga and probably more movies. We're in the middle of Die Hard. hahaha! Awesome!

I'd like to have a nap today, but we will see. Howie is coming over to help me start my garden a bit and I have no idea what that means, but it'll be good to get outside a bit since work and Special K have kept me busy so far this week.

More tomorrow!

Cleanse DAY THREE

1pm: It seems as though nothing all that remarkable is happening. I'm not losing massive amounts of weight, I'm not on top of the world, and shockingly, I'm not really craving any food whatsoever. So.. I'm not sure if my expectations were out of whack, or what.

This morning Special K and I worked out again together to a DVD and he had breakfast early, while I grazed on some strawberries and a few raw cashews that took me nearly 5 hours to finish. I am not hungry today. I had some leftover garbanzo bean/pistachio bake for lunch ONLY b/c you can't eat very heavy several hours before yoga and yoga starts at 3:30. I'm down just about 13 lbs for the year, but only 5.2 since I weighed myself on Monday and frankly I'm not sure how accurate my first weigh in was since 3 hours later I was down 4.6 lbs. So... ANYway.

2:20pm: GOD!! The bulk items at WinCo almost did me in! I wanted a piece of easter chocolate something terrible. But it subsided. So far neither Special K nor I am really craving anything, but we have also been relatively sequestered and isolated. I'm finally hungry, but can't really eat anything as I need a pretty empty stomach for Yin Yoga.

This has been a lot easier than I thought it would be. The food we've made has all been very tasty and I'm not dissatisfied one bit. I also spent two weeks prepping myself for this so that helped as well. Do I imagine myself as a Macro Vegan or Vegetarian? Not really. But then again, we'll see how this all works out. I'm not putting this in a box yet other than committing to this process for what it is for now.

Basically... not much to report. I hope you are all having a great day!

Cleanse DAY TWO

Hi All!

Because it's been requested of me, here are the recipes I made yesterday. I have to say that the zesty garbanzo beans with pistachios was AMAZING!!!

http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Garbanzos-with-Fennel/Detail.aspx
http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Green-Salad-with-Sauce-Vinaigrette-354345
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Zesty-Garbanzo-Beans-with-Pistachio-Nuts/Detail.aspx

So Day One seemed ok for me but a bit more difficult for Special K. We both had that empty fullness, or barely hungry feeling all day. Although we both worked out separately in the morning, we spend all evening on the couch watching movies. In case you're wondering, we watched Extract, Funny People and Food, Inc. Have you SEEN Food, Inc? My god... very frightening. I never want to eat anything with soy in it every again! Too bad EVERYthing has soy in it (except all the stuff we're eating this week actually). And soy is just the beginning.

Anyway. It's almost 9am now. Special K is on a walk and I'm a bit bleary eyed and definitely getting hungry. Will do a work out of some sort I THINK today although I'd really rather have a nap. LOL Hopefully I'll get more energy from this today or tomorrow. I drank a gallon plus of water yesterday so things are certainly being cleansed away.

Until tomorrow.... :)

Diet and Cleanse - DAY ONE

Today is Day One of my and Special K's elimination diet and cleanse. It is essentially a macro diet for 5 days and then we will reintroduce food one at a time which means we'll be eating like this really for about 3-4 weeks depending on what foods we will be able to tolerate and which ones we won't be able to during the reintroduction phase.

We spent the 10 days prior to this essentially pigging out. Eating burgers, fries, cheese galore, Mexican... whatever the heck we wanted. I am still 8 lbs down from the beginning of this year so I didn't just pack on a bunch of pounds from my scarfing everything in sight.

So today starts with me being pretty tired and low energy. Around 9am I go to make my liver cleanse tea for later and my steel cut oats, which I have loved in the past. But as I make the oats, and mix the first batch with blueberries, then add cinnamon, then add a dash of salt, and eventually add it to the trash can, I remember I loved my steel cut oats with a sprinkle of Splenda brown sugar, which is now a no go. My second batch tastes like powder from the heap of cinnamon I add so it, too, gets dumped. I opt, instead for a handful of cashews and almonds and a cup of strawberries.

Strangely enough, I'm not that hungry. So at 11:35am, after a 15 minute attempt at a nap and a 30 minute cardio kickboxing work out, most of my breakfast still remains to be eaten. I'm sure this will change soon. I'm sure I will be hungry every few hours once the meat and fat gets fully digested and out of my body from the last few days. Then I'll be ravenous. Hopefully Special K won't be missing any limbs by the time this is all over *gnaw gnaw gnaw*

Today for lunch I made a Garbanzo and Fennel soup thing which is a bit bland, but with salt should be fine. I have never cooked Fennel before. It doesn't seem to have a distinctive flavor or smell and I had NO idea how to cut it up, but... I made believe it was an onion and I treated it like one. Tonight's dinner entails a garbanzo and pistachio nut bake thing of some sort. For dessert, I think Special K will make some fried plantain. In between I have fresh mangoes, pears, apples, almond butter, grapes (that are to DIE for, by the way), pineapple, strawberries and some other green fruit that looks like squash but I actually have no idea what it is, but am excited to try it. I'm sure there will be lots of salads and nut munching, too.

Overall, I think I have some activities to keep Special K from being too bored here during the week and we'll be working out and going to the gym together as well. Tonight will be movies galore what with this crappy stormy weather and another night this week I'm sure we'll make into game night. Weird to watch movies and play games without a glass of wine or beer. I'm also taking Friday off so we can spend the day at the hot springs treating ourselves for a good Macro-Vegan week. :)

Already miss cottage cheese.

Elimination Diet and Whole Food Cleanse - T minus 17 days

My naturopath has prescribed an elimination diet and whole food cleanse to be done concurrently for a period of 5 days starting Monday March 29th. This is to determine any food allergies I may have that are causing my overall sense of sluggishness as of late and also to cleanse my fat cells and liver of any toxins to prompt weight loss, which is the secondary goal of my going to see Dr. David.

The difference between an elimination diet and the cleanse? NO animal products. I'll already be cutting out most meats, all dairy, all gluten, all refined sugar, some veggies and some fruits, but with the whole food cleanse, I will not be eating soy beans, tofu, lamb or any other animal products whatsoever. So essentially I'll be turning Vegan for 5 days and consisting on nuts, seeds, legunes, whole grains such as millet, steel cut oats, quionoa (sp?), beans other than soy beans, fruits other than citrus and veggies other than tomato, potato and corn. I can each as much as I want (I was warned I would likely be hungry every couple of hours) and it will force me to be creative in terms of tasty meal ideas as I can't eat out at all. All salads can only have dressing of olive oil and vinegar.

So why the wait between now and then? I've been given tasks in the next 2 weeks. Week One: Start eating through foods around the house that I need to get rid of (milk, cheese, meats, etc). Cut back from two cups of coffee to one. Look into getting a whole foods cookbook and do some research about whole foods cooking. Week Two: Cut down to 1/2 cup of coffee a day. Purchase all the foods I'll need for the 5 days. And start drinking a root blend tea once a day meant to purify the liver. When the cleanse/diet starts, I can drink no caffeine and have no alcohol.

Here is an interesting twist. On top of all of this, my boyfriend, Special K, is going to do it with me. Not only to support me, but b/c it's good for you and he loves all things that are good for you. He is nervous about no coffee, no beer (!!) and no yogurt (he loves his daily dose of culture). He also thinks he should stay with me for all 5 days so we can support each other through cravings, cook together, etc. Hmmm....

So... I'm actually really excited about this. I was nervous at the idea of doing an elimination diet b/c I thought it consisted of being on it for weeks and weeks but that is not the case at all and I can totally eat like this for only 5 days. I will likely feel amazing and may even find things I like and learn how to incorporate some of these foods into my daily diet after all is said and done.

I will likely be blogging during this process so stay tuned! :)

The Other Side of the Bed

It is very strange for me to get used to sleeping with someone in bed together more than the occasional sleepover that I once feared and longed for simultaneously. The adjustment to being in an actual relationship is a whole other story and we're not here to talk about that for now.

Now I have someone in my bed 1-3 nights a week depending on the week and, while it's been loads of fun, it's been an interesting adjustment. Here are some of the things one deals with when sleeping with a partner that you don't have to think about when you sleep alone:

* Space. I'm a diagonal sleeper. I have a Queen sized bed and when I first turn out the light, my head goes to the left and my feet to the right with my ass right dab in the middle. Now I have to sleep straight and stay relatively to my side so I'm not pushing him off the bed (while I'm sure that would be funny, loud thumps in the middle of the night startle me).

* Covers. Alone I have them all. With a partner, they always seem to slide to his side. I don't mind pulling them back to my side when I get cold or kicking them back over to him to roll around in when I get hot, but I find myself having to let go of what once was the near perfection of my bed. I used to wake up and gently pull the covers up and TA-DA the bed was made. Now it's a full on exercise b/c the sheet is pulled out from the bottom, I have no idea where one of the down comforters went and my abundance of pillows are every which way.

* Sweat. Now, night sweats are pretty rare for both my boyfriend and me, but it happens. When I'm alone, I'm like "ugh" but I just roll ever for dryer sheets and pillows and don't think anything of it. With a partner, you feel bad b/c they have to lay in their own wet stuff and while you want to give them some of your dry stuff, you don't want their sweaty selves all over you, either. Work out sweat is sexy. But for some reason, sleep sweat is not. Weird, right?

* Snoring. Alone I snore away and don't hear it. With a boyfriend, I wear earplugs but always worry I'm going to miss something he may say to me in the middle of the night.

* Every breath you take. We both wake up whenever the other person rolls over (prompting the other to, in turn, adjust their position). I get up to pee approximately 500 times when my boyfriend is over instead of my normal 100 times when I am alone and it always wakes him up. And the sweetheart always holds the covers back and snuggles with me when I come back (awww). Sometimes he doesn't fall asleep right away and for some reason, I don't tend to fall asleep fully until he does or well after. Other times, the man will get up at dawn and go for an hour walk and then come back to bed for more snuggles and napping, during which I usually sleep like a dead person.


The thing is... I have been alone and slept alone (and preferred to) for a long time. And even though it's an adjustment to sleep in the same bed with someone on a regular basis and I generally get a lot less sleep thus far than I normally would... I love every minute of it. This guy rocks my world in the best possible way and I love falling asleep next to him and having his face be the first I see in the morning. It is SO worth it.

Hi everyone! Long time, no talk. I was going through my MySpace blogs recently b/c I'm going to be closing my MySpace account and as I was going through and printing old blogs so I would have them always, I found this from June of 2008:

But... when i find the one. The right one. The one who is the balance between kind and exciting; good and naughty; sincere and passionate; etc etc.... .... I can't wait to do things like... make out for no reason other than to make out. Without even the end result being sex. To go on vacation together. To stay in bed all day and laugh and talk and nap and make love. To go to a far away tropical place and watch sunsets and make love on the beach and drink margaritas and mimosas and eat fresh fruit in our robes on a balcony. I can't wait to have an argument and TRUST that a fight doesn't mean the end of anything. I can't wait to be over my fear of someone just... changing their mind... b/c they love me and they would never just wake up one day and leave. I can't wait to have adventures and last minute road trips and to hike and swim and go fishing and to buy a boat and a home and to have a wedding and babies and a dog. I can't wait for any of it. Today, I FEEL that love. I feel mushy and flushed and excited. You'd think I had it bad for someone, but I don't. I'm just... happy at the idea of it. I really have to believe and have faith that all of this awaits me. That when I am ready, and I am healthy, and the other waste has faded from my heart and there is room, that this person will simply walk right into my life. And I won't feel swept away... rather it will be a gradual progression. And it will be real.

And just as I was in the middle of reading this, my boyfriend calls me. And so then I read it to him. And it made me cry. B/c you know. I put this out there. And I held onto it. And then I forgot. But in time, it came to me. And it's beautiful and amazing.

Resolutions

Well, it's about that time of year when I debrief on my resolutions which I've done for the past several years. For me personally, I'm a big resolution fan. In the last 4 years or so, I've typed them out and made them visible and seeing them every day has helped me to meet my goals.

Here is how I did in 2009:
1. Lose 50-85 lbs. Uhhh... I actually PUT ON weight. Oops.

2. Go to the gym 3 days a week and do one day a week of yoga. I don't think I did the yoga but for a long while I was working out very regularly, especially this spring and summer. Then I got sick and didn't go back. It's been six months.

3. Pursue hobbies:
* Knitting (made TONS of scarves and hats this year!)
* Writing (took a writing workshop and realized I'm just not a good writer. But I tried it!)
* Yoga/Meditation (fell very short on this. Early in the year, I did yoga and meditation with Nicole but that fizzled out quickly)
* Reading (I finally have been better about reading. I love it so much and never make time for it. And this year I did and I'm so glad!)
* Modeling (tried this too and had a few trade photo shoots. I don't think it's for me although I did have fun with it)
* Sewing (this wasn't originally on the list, but it is a hobby I've started. I don't know how to sew but I know how to make the machine go which means I made curtains and lots of bags. hahaha! Easy stuff)

4. Continue with CODA and step work. I finished my step study group and continue to go to meetings and read literature.

5. Take one vacation just for me and just for fun: I really ended up doing this a few times. I rented a beach house for 4 nights in May. I went to Vegas in early December which really wasn't just for me, but it was just for fun. And I just spent 4 days at the coast over New Year's which was very lazy and relaxing. It reminded me that I need to plan more trips, even if they are local. I value vacations!

6. Go on at least 3 hikes this year. I ended up going on 5 hikes! First time really getting out there and hiking in years. And I started with a doozie so I knew I could do it. It was great fun! I even went on one alone. Felt amazing!

So overall I think I did pretty well on my resolutions for 2009 and I think I set some very reasonable goals for 2010. They are as follows:

1. Lost 35 lbs (starting today in fact!)

2. go to gym 3 days a week, weight training 2 days a week and yoga OR meditation 1 day a week.

3. Learn to knit socks and gloves

4. Attend 2 CODA meetings a month and do the steps again on my own.

5. Go on at least FIVE hikes this year.

6. Quit Caffeine

7. Plan one 3+ night vacation.

And there you have it! We'll gather and discuss again in a year! If you are a resolution type, I hope you, too, set reasonable goals and wish you all the support you need to reach them!

Happy New Year!!