Thursday, February 28, 2013

The Scale

In an effort to get back onto a fully Paleo diet to keep the skin healthy and not freaked out, I have decided that I am trying an experiment.

I have eaten Paleo in the past, sometimes for a good many months at a time, and I always feel great eating with that way of life. HOWEVER... I tend to weigh myself 1-2 times a week and when I find I'm not making the progress I think I should, I get frustrated and my food addict comes up to convince me why veering off the Paleo path is such a good idea. Especially when I'm not getting the results I expect.

So I'm detaching myself from the outcome and I have hid my scale for the entire month of March. I will not weigh myself for one month. I put the scale away last night in fact. I already totally miss it... the spot where it normally sits in the bathroom taunting me with the fear of GAINING weight in the next month.

I have meals planned for the week, I have SCHEDULED workout times for next week that I have committed to doing. And I will do this for one month before I torture myself with the scale. I'll focus on how I FEEL... on if my eczema is clearing up and not re-sprouting, on if my pants are fitting looser.

Wish me luck! :)

Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Hump Day Randomisms

How long as it been since you saw THAT somewhere? Back in the day, I'd do my randomisms every hump day! It's good to be putting one out there again after so long! YAY!

So it's official... no grains, beans, gluten, yeast, sugar, dairy and preferable to my MD, no alcohol, too. I've excema all over and I must go to a hard core Paleo diet to keep it in check. That and a healthy dose of cortisone to my tushy today will *fingers crossed* keep it at bay. I swear, I'm only 34 and I'm falling apart! My skin is so angry, I pulled my IT band somehow and I have a touch of rotator cuff tendonitis. Awesome.

HOWEVER... I've scheduled five days of exercise next week! 2 at home work outs, 2 weight classes and 1 cycle class. I bought myself some padded bike shorts to hopefully keep chaffing and bruised butt bone to a minimum. I'm so out of shape so I know the cycle class will kill me, but... I can go slow and go at my own pace and build up from there.

I spend SO MUCH time thinking about weight loss and my relationship with food. It's wasteful, really, all the energy and time I spend. And I am selective in what I feel is "meant to be" but... I have to say... with the skin being the largest organ we have and if going back to Paleo is what I need to keep me healthy, then I feel that my skin is telling me something. It is telling me that I need to focus less on the end result and more on nourishing my body. When I've done Paleo before, it's always been with a weight loss goal in mind and when that doesn't work out at the rate I feel it should, I get frustrated and comfort myself with food. (Alas, my relationship with food is complicated!) But... I'm going to hide my scale the entire month of March and delve back into Paleo cooking, Paleo dining out, Paleo everything b/c if that is going to keep my rash at bay, I will be happier. No matter how much I want that cookie or cupcake or piece of toast or rice with my Thai food. I'm going to spend one whole month not weighing myself and working out every week and eating the way my body needs and make it about health and not about weight. Wish me luck.

My love is leaving for training in Alaska soon for two weeks. I've not been two weeks apart from him in over 3 years. Not even during our first year when we were "off and on" did I go a full two weeks without seeing him. I'm happy for him, nervous for him and scared and sad and excited all at the same time. The organization he's going to go to work for is so disorganized that it's literally making me crazy. I take many deep breaths and steps back. K is also not an organized person so maybe he can handle it. And it's his stuff anyway. It's been a real lesson in letting go control of someone else's stuff and letting them manage their life for themselves instead of assuming they need me to manage it for them. ha!

On that note, I have total "last meal" mentality and am going to go get sushi take out tonight and going to catch up on my shows on OnDemand. Girls, Once Upon a Time, Nashville and SMASH! Yeah!

Happy Hump Day everyone!

~L

Friday, February 22, 2013

Testing Testing *tap tap tap*

Is there anybody out there? I have all but neglected not just you, but the inner workings of myself as well. My ability to express myself and feel a little heard. I've been pondering the thought of coming back to blogging for some time now and I think it's time. There are changes afoot in Flye-land and I need an outlet and support. And frankly, I'll have the time. ;-) So just a little note to keep an eye out. I'm coming back! TGIF, friends!